Thanksgiving Traditions

Most families celebrate holidays in a particular way, from the foods they eat to the significance they give to the holiday.

Most holidays revolve around a central religious theme. However, as society becomes more secular, religious themes are quieted down and replaced by commercialism and profit motives.

Does that sound harsh? I’m sure it does, but it is the truth.

It is also costly. I never paid much attention to the cost of holiday preparation; I just expected it. I’m thinking and preparing for Thanksgiving now. It is several months away, and many holidays come before it. Surprisingly, Halloween has significantly increased in popularity over the last 20 years. There have always been costumes and treats, but it seems almost to have a cult following now. I was never allowed to Trick or Treat as a child, not because of any religious objection but because my parents feared me walking around the neighborhood at night. After all, I wouldn’t have been alone. I was allowed to dress up and hand out candy at the door to our house. At least I felt like I was part of something. To me, Halloween paled to Thanksgiving, which remains my favorite holiday.

As a child, I remember sitting in our living room glued to the tiny TV in the big cabinet. I would watch the Macy’s Day Thanksgiving Day Parade from start to finish. I loved the balloons, I loved the music and marching bands, and I held my breath with the kicking line of the Rockettes. I would be delighted when I recognized my favorite TV characters on floats. We didn’t live that far, but my parents convinced me it was much better to be comfortable at home than standing out in the weather. On that, I agreed with them.

While I sat and watched, my Mom was cooking in the kitchen, and everything was filled with the aroma of what was to come in the evening. It took her all day to produce the meal. It wasn’t very often that we had turkey and mashed sweet potatoes. Finally, the moment in the parade arrived. Santa was in town. I would cry, oh not a sobbing, I’m hurt kind of cry, but a few tears would escape as I saw the jolly old man saying Merry Christmas. Even though I had Channukah, I still received Christmas presents, and even though I would be invited next door to my Italian neighbor's home to see Santa and give all the neighborhood children a small gift, I always felt the holiday of Christmas was not mine.

Thanksgiving, though, was mine! Anyone can be thankful, and I most definitely was. After 20 years of celebrating with my parents, Thanksgiving would forever change. My parents moved to Florida, and I was married. My mother-in-law would have the entire clan for the Thanksgiving holiday. It was grand. She was a fabulous cook, and everybody chipped in something yummy for dinner. While some of us were setting up the tables and chairs, most adults and a few older kids would play a game of touch football in the yard. We would eat at about 3 o'clock and then clean up to play cards and puzzle games.

Then, my in-laws would gather everyone around and pass out our Chanukah gelt, or money. We knew it was almost impossible for us all to be together for another holiday only a month apart. Each Thanksgiving, the family came from Boston and Albany and, of course, us from Long Island to the New Rochelle home we all loved. No one opened their envelopes. The kids knew it was not to spend. It was a contribution to their future. The parents would use the money for things needed and perhaps save a little as well.

It was indeed a “Kumbaya” experience—that was until we went home and tore everyone apart! This is typical family stuff.

Thanksgiving stopped for us when Nonny couldn’t handle it anymore. It was a lot of work, and she wasn’t feeling well. Tragedy struck when Nonny died, followed by one of my sisters-in-law. It could never be replicated.

When my husband and I came to Virginia, my children settled here, and my grandchildren were here, I resurrected Thanksgiving. I still watch the parade and cry a little when Santa comes. I still cook way too much food for the 13 usual guests and usually a few more who join us. We routinely have a second Thanksgiving the next day.

I create scavenger and treasure hunts to keep everyone busy and out of my kitchen until the meal is ready to serve. It’s a lot of work and takes a lot out of me, but I love it.

So whenever this blog appears in your feed, let me wish you a Happy Thanksgiving.