Nature or Nurture?
The eternal debate. Of course, we know we inherit physical features from one generation to another. We also know that certain diseases and disabilities are inherited from one generation to another. But what of abilities, excellence in art, music, or math? It’s known that many families produce doctors or lawyers. Others create athletes who excel over others. The converse is also true; suddenly, in a family of accountants, there is a Broadway musical star born or a nuclear physicist in a family of interior decorators. Some people follow a prescribed path to a career. My mother-in-law was a concert pianist. All three of her children had music careers. My father-in-law was a physician, yet none of them went into medicine. Was the musicality inherited or just nurtured?
I was doomed in a way to be a teacher. ( Not that that’s a bad thing.) My mother told me from birth that a teacher would always have a job and a summer vacation! My own Kindergarten teacher was a stunning young woman. When I entered Kindergarten at not quite five years old, I figured that being a Kindergarten teacher would create that for me! It was good and bad. I had a goal, and I accomplished it. However, I had no idea what was out there in the world, and there might have been a better fit!
As a parent, I was guilty of the same thing. My son had a very obvious keen mind from day one. His grandfather and several uncles were doctors. Although interested in medicine, he entertained the idea that he wanted to be a comedian! I told him, and I meant it, that he could do anything he wanted after he completed his MD. For a short while during Internship, he bonded with other doctors and did improv. They called themselves Vitreous Humor, which was more than appropriate. During one of the performances, he walked off the stage during a skit and proposed to his wife!
So how much do we bend our natural inherited inclinations to fit an expected or desired different outcome? Are we all just pigeonholed into something that we are expected to be? Then again, some, like my daughter, found her way in a field that none of us even thought existed in our time. She has excelled in it!
I am blessed with five grandchildren. Each of those kids is totally unique from each other. They resemble each other, but their personalities and interests go from one end of the spectrum to another. Will they follow the prescribed lives, the safe, albeit not always the best suited for them? Or will they branch out to new endeavors? Whatever they do, I hope they are happy and able to live well. In the meantime, I will wonder what they inherited from my husband and myself and how they were nurtured to follow their dreams.
